- My running tights had a nice long string hanging from the "crotchal" region where apparently the seam is coming undone. Boo. But it made me laugh because I had a "string wiener." Hee hee.
Me: 1, Run: 1
- It was cold and dark so I dressed all in black (ninja running bandit style!) in my lightweight REI jacket with wicked reflectors, black ear warmers from the dollar store (holla!) and my Christmas present North Face gloves (aka really expensive running hankies). Except I wore my super bright neon yellow Nike Lunars!
Me: 2, Run: 1
- While trying to locate a satellite, Gus decided that he didn't like me not taking him out yesterday and wanted to say I'm low on juice with a pronounced "beeeep." Great...we'll see how long he lasts.
Me: 2, Run: 2
- Feeling good starting out! Got a decent stride going...oh wait...wheez...forgot to take a puff on the inhaler before I left.
Me: 2, Run: 3
- Getting a little foggy out, making my eyes water a little. Spotted a really loud, scary "rapist" van on the main street. And it comes back around and passes me again 5 minutes later. Okay, I'm done with that road for the night.
Me: 2, Run: 4
- Hey, Gus should have beeped the one mile mark a while back. I look down to a blank screen. Crappity crap. Instead I check the current time on the iPhone...7:20...I'll keep that in mind.
Me: 2, Run: 5
- Is that a plastic bag of dog poo on the sidewalk? Wait, no. It's MULTIPLE plastic bags of dog poo. Wow. All in a "neat little pile" on the sidewalk. That's one step to cleaning up after your dog but WTH??? I'm tempted to stake out the scene later this week, identify the culprit, then take all of the dog poo bags and leave them on his/her front door. How ya like dem apples?
Me: 2, Run: 6, Stupid dog-owner: -6
- Alright, there's a streetlamp out up ahead, not my favorite part of the run either. Impromptu FARTLEK!
Me: 2, Run: 7
- Got straight up branch slapped in the face by a tree that I normally run by without fail. (Tree: "Not this time, sucka.")
Me: 2, Run: 8, Tree: +9
- Someone's home cooking smells like dirty feet and wet dog. Ugh. Hot wet dog. Is that possible?
Me: 2, Run: 9
- Annnnnnd, I trip stepping up to the sidewalk. Contemplating running in the snowboarding helmet I got for Christmas from Trav...
Me: 2, Run: 10
- Another streetlamp is out? Am I in a scary movie or something? Should I be looking behind me for a dude in a hockey mask or sporting some fangs?
Me: 2, Run: 11
- Now THIS one is the kicker. I'm running up to the normal turn-around point and guess what cruises past me in all its chrome/black glory and screeches to a halt at the stop sign???? A *#%@$ nekkid semi!! Ah gawd. Impromptu fartlek number two.
Me: 2, Run: 12
- As I'm fartlek-ing away from the chrome monster something runs right in front of me from the bushes and across the street. A giant raccoon. Fartleks + near heart-attack from night dwelling creature = wheeeeeeezy me.
Me: 2, Run: 13
- Oooo, my favorite song plays! Score!
Me: 3, Run: 13
- Back at home, out of breath, I realize that my left foot was "kissed" by my shoes a little too much and left a nice red mark. Thanks Lunars. This matches perfectly with the black toenail I received from the New Balances...
Me: 3, Run: 14
Nothing like an adventure.
And perhaps a post-run beer and epsom salt soak.
Tomorrow will be better!